Tuesday, August 04, 2009

A 19th century bill

This is a bill I came across, dated 2nd December, 1835.

Correcting the ten Commandments.5s 6d
Embellishing Pontius Pilate and putting new ribbon in his bonnet.5s 6d
Putting a new tail on the rooster of St. Peter and mending his comb.10s 0d
Replenishing and gilding the left wing of the Guardian Angel.4s 9d
Washing the servant of St. Paul and putting carmine on his cheeks.5s 6d
Renewing heaven, adjusting two stars and cleaning the moon.7s 10d
Putting five additional rays to the sun.3s 4d
Re-animating the flames of purgatory and restoring some souls.5s 4d
Reviving the flames of Hell, putting a new tail to the Devil, and mending his hoof and doing several little jobs for the damned.7s 0d
Re-bordering the robe of Herod, and re-adjusting his wig.4s 0d
Re-touching Joseph and his coat of many colours.2s 0d
Cleaning the ears of Balaam's ass and shodding him.3s 2d
Putting new ear-rings in the ears of Sarah.2s 4d
Putting new stones in David's sling, enlarging the head of Goliath and extending his legs.3s 0d
Mending the shirt of the Prodigal son and washing his hands and face.3s 0d
Total£3 15s 3d

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I love it. This could only be a list for God! "Renewing heaven, adjusting two stars and cleaning the moon"

But on second thought I can't see God Reviving the flames of hell and mending the devil's hoof.

This is priceless. I can just imagine the person who put this bill together snickering as he made his list.

Thanks for sharing.